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The motivation to homeschool

Over at the Living Free Project, there is a post about why the author home educates her children, and I thought I would share it to find out what you think about it. In my own heart, I agree with Alonso; I think mammals are meant to learn from their own families and communities, and as much as we deny our biological instincts when it comes to parenting, working and even eating, it is something we should at least attempt to understand. I’m not saying that parents cannot work, or that the mother must stay home with the children while the father works; on the contrary, either parent at home would be best for the child—in my opinion—even if that means alternating schedules where different parents work at different times of the day. So the thing I did not agree with was that motherhood alone is the driving force behind home education; I think that parenting, rather, should be.

She also argues that we should never say that the argument “not every parent can do it” is invalid, which I do not agree with. Not every parent has a support system, and not every parent even has a partner. While I do know several single parents who homeschool, they do have friends or family who help out. There are single parents with many children to support who could not do so without working outside the home, and if you have no support system in place at all, I can see how you could not homeschool. I’ve argued before that you can work and homeschool—I do, and I know many moms who do—but most of the homeschooling moms that I know do not have a job outside of homeschooling and taking care of their families (which, let’s be clear, is a more-than-full-time job itself).

The Living Free Project often features stories that I do not agree with, especially as a feminist (ahem), but this is one that resonates with me because I, too, feel like home schooling—like breastfeeding and co-sleeping and so many other “controversial” subjects—is just a natural extension of raising children. It’s living. It’s not, “What curriculum do you use?” like so many parents want to know (though most have no idea what curriculum their own schools use), it’s “What are we going to go out and learn in the world today?” It’s life. It’s what we did before industrialization complicated things, and though I am definitely not arguing that progress is bad (dude, the washing machine? Seriously, what a great invention), I do think that we tend to ignore our natural instincts. We turn toward experts to find out everything from how to put our babies to bed to what to eat when our ancestors did these things without anyone but their families and communities sharing the load. It’s unreal; I’ve seen people Google everything from how to change a tire to how to brew tea, and while I love that we have access to so much information, I am left gaping over what we don’t know and what we think we must learn from the “experts.” Why can’t we trust ourselves like we did throughout the entire history of human civilization?

I’ve diverted from the original topic a bit, but I do feel like homeschooling, at least in my family's case, is simply part of our life. Learning doesn’t happen at a specific time, at a specific place; it is a constant process does not stop until your heart stops. Maybe people who can look at it in this light can understand it a bit better, as well as understand the reason why so many parents are choosing this way to live—and maybe parents who have thought about it but decided not to because of work constraints might give it another thought, too. Need help working out a schedule or ideas to support your family and homeschool? Comment below and I’ll do my best to help out. For parents who absolutely feel that they cannot homeschool but are not fans of the school system itself, I heartily recommend the book Guerilla Schooling, a wonderful resource for compromising.

And ultimately, I’d like to hear from homeschooling parents about your motivation for homeschooling. Do you feel like it’s something that you “should” do out of obligation, or as a natural extension of your parenting? Do you think it would work for all people, or that it could work for everyone if enough support were in place?

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