Thinking about yesterday's bad craft (toilet paper roll dolls) reminded me of the horror that is the Bed Doll. I have a big family and some of my older aunts and great aunts are quite nutty with the crafts, particularly anything involving incredibly intricate crochet.
When I think about Bed Dolls I think of the one that my grandmother had, which was given to her by one of those other relatives. She used to have to put it out on her bed before any family gathering, to show her appreciation for the horrible gift. (Ain't that always the way?) It used to give me quite a start to walk into her room and spot the Bed Doll giving you her glassy gimlet-eyed stare from across the room.
Bed Dolls are… well, I'm at a loss for words to explain them. Take a doll and remove its lower half. Then crochet a huge frothy dress for it. Now set it atop your bed. The aforementioned huge frothy dress will spread out, allowing the doll's body to remain vertical. As if it was sitting on your bed.
No, I don't know why you couldn't just have a doll sitting on your bed with legs. That's part of the horror. Looking at it on the bed spread and knowing that there's just a torso stump under all those petticoats and skirts. (While we're at it, why have a doll sitting on your bed at all?)
No one seems to have an explanation for this phenomena. I found a lot of patterns for crocheted bed dolls, but no explanation as to the appeal. It's like a decorator pillow that stares back at you. I guess we will have to chalk it up to being a product of that strange urge that compels some people to heedlessly decorate every single surface in their house.
Image courtesy Flickr/IrisDragon
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