Delicious or too sweet?

Eggnog foods, from best to worst

12/17/13

Alcoholic eggnog: A+
Yes, please! The booze not only makes this a fun holiday drink, it also completely changes the taste and texture of the drink, transforming it from a thick holiday sludge to a delicious cocktail. It's basically a Brandy Alexander, but much cheaper, and less froo-froo.

Eggnog latte: A-
Eggnog lattes are one of the best things about the holiday season. Coffee shops cut the eggnog 50/50 with milk, which lightens it up. Steaming it makes it frothy and less heavy. And the dark rich taste of espresso helps balance out eggnog's sweetness.

Eggnog cheesecake: B+
This is basically just regular cheesecake with a lot of nutmeg flavor. Nothing not to like about that. What keeps eggnog cheesecake from getting a better grade is that it is often just a little bit too sweet. Or sometimes a lot too sweet. The whole idea behind cheesecake is that it should be just the slightest bit tart and/or sour. Eggnog cheesecake tends to blot out that subtlety and come off as insipidly sweet instead.

Eggnog baked goods (cupcakes, pancakes, etc): C+
These are usually pretty decent, but you can't exactly taste the eggnog, so I'm not sure what the point is.

Eggnog in coffee: C-
This is one of those things that always seems like a better idea in theory than it turns out to be in practice.

In theory it's like the home version of a yummy eggnog latte. In practice the eggnog sinks sullenly to the bottom of the cup and has to be stirred up vigorously to mix. And more often than not, a slick of soybean oil separates out and floats to the top of the drink.

Eggnog ice cream: D
It's like eggnog but thicker and sweeter. Sorry, but this is just not happening.

Eggnog milkshake: F
It's like eggnog ice cream but thicker and sweeter, AND you're supposed to drink it through a straw. It's like a 16-ounce cup of NOPE.

Image courtesy Flickr/freakgirl