The Tea Cosy in Brighton

For the lover of unique restaurants that are there simply to make you feel uncomfortable and inadequate, I have a nice one for you today.  It’s called The Tea Cosy and it’s located in Brighton, UK.  It’s not really a restaurant, however, as much as a tea house where you can get yourself a little something to eat.  But the appeal of The Tea Cosy is that it brings to life the stereotypical view of the uppity English aristocracy and their haughty tea-drinking rituals.

The first thing you will notice upon walking into The Tea Cosy is that it looks like a shrine to all things English Royalty.  The entire place is covered from floor to ceiling in Royal Family memorabilia and the tables are graced with Union Jack tablecloths.

The next thing you’ll probably notice is the service.  Those who own and run The Tea Cosy take on the personas of people you might expect to be hanging about in a stuffy English tea house.  They are extremely polite and helpful and pride themselves on bringing their customers only the most excellent of service.

It’s when you sit down to have your tea, however, that things take an even stranger turn.  You menu, in addition to listing off a selection cakes, scones, sandwiches (finger sandwiches with the crusts cut off, of course) and their great tea selection, also includes a list of rules on how to properly behave and drink your tea. 

When dining at The Tea Cosy, you’ll be expected to follow certain etiquette, such as not using cell phones, no elbows allowed on the tables and a prohibition against talking ill of the Royal Family.  You must also prepare and consume in a certain manner.  Clinking a spoon against the side of a tea cup is bad form as is placing your spoon in the improper place on the saucer when you’re done with it.  You must also never, ever dunk your biscuits like a commoner does.  Failure to follow the rules can result in a person getting kicked to the curb, although I’m not sure on exactly how strict they are about this.

The Tea Cosy certainly sounds like a tense place to enjoy a cup of tea, but if you go in for unique atmospheres, this is one for the list.  They also allow groups to reserve the entire tea house if need be and provide some catering services.  Check out their official web site for more information.

Tea Cosy cake photo courtesy of Jessica via Wikicommons